If I gave you the moon

Just watched a late night Netflix film classic: There's No Business Like Show Business. Man, I love Marilyn Monroe. I like to take screen captions of my favorite parts. It's a more visual and detailed quote collection. Because songs can say how I feel better than I can:

After you get what you want you don't want it.
If I gave you the moon, you'd grow tired of it soon.
You're like a baby, you want what you want when you want it.
But after you are presented with what you want, you're discontented.
You're always wishing and wanting for something
When you get what you want, you don't want what you get,
And though I sit upon your knee, you'll grow tired of me,
'cause after you get what you want,
You don't want what you wanted at all.

Be Bright

I write down cool quotes in a small notebook. Be it from a film, television show, book, celebrity, friend, or myself, I write it down. The subjects range, but my love of the words remain everlasting. I'm always on the hunt for well-crafted words, phrases, sentences.

This quote is from the character Red in the Shawshank Redemption, an excellent movie. My Netflix queue is always very long and I decided to finally watch it. I was pleasantly surprised. I kept my notebook nearby for access in case I was inspired, which I was. 

"Some birds are not meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright." To me, this means parrots should never be pets because they have bright feathers. Never cage a bird! Okay okay. That was an attempt at a "joke." This signifies the importance of being individual. Be your own person. Be bright.

In case you were wondering, the photo of the pigeon is one I took in Athens, Greece, hence the ancient ruin in the background.

Have a fantastic day.

Where are my keys?

Every day. Every single day. I lose my keys. It happens every time, without fail. I am heading out the door. I close the door. I put my hand in my purse. Where are my keys? I fling open the door. I quickly run to my room and search everywhere. The desk. The table. The nightstand. The bed. Where is it? Eventually, I see a bit of brightness out of the corner of my eye. My keys!  Then I get the hell out of there.

A Mental Tattoo

A picture is worth a thousand words. I believe it. It's worth more, really. A photograph is like a mental tattoo. You'll have the moment forever, it's essence epitomized for eternity. There are a million details in one photo.

In class, I had to write a seven page paper analysing a photograph of George Bush. I didn't know it was possible to have so much to say on one picture, but it is. What did the photograph say? What was the message, the tone, the personal perspective, historical perspective, the context?

By looking at this photo I took, what do you see?


It is simple to say that there are flowers and a building. The focus is on the flower, but the architecture can easily be seen. There is a little bit of sky showing at the top of the photo.

This photo was taken in Vienna, Austria on July 5, 2010. This is a picture of St. Stephen's Cathedral, a grand, massive church. It is utterly gorgeous inside and out. It towers over you, overwhelms you really. I could not get the entire tower from top to bottom in the shot; it wasn't possible.

It was a hot summer's day. Tons of tourists were flocking to the church, taking photos and talking noisily. The sky was baby blue. The clouds were fluffy and white like an enormous cotton ball. The sky is more beautiful abroad. It's official. I've decided.

I had taken various shots of the amazing architecture, trying to take the experience all in. I took a couple of shots with the Barbie pink flowers and the Cathedral, but this one was the one that focused. I love flowers and I love churches. Both components of the photo were beautiful to me. Put the two together and I am in heaven.

What you see in this photograph is beauty. Pink flowers. A pretty church. What you can't see: me. You'll never know how happy I was, how fatigued I was, how my hair looked. But I will.

A photo is a less permanent tattoo. You don't have to look at it every day when you get dressed, but you can look at it whenever you want. In 10, 50, or 100 years from now, that moment will exist for others to witness. It is perplexing, the power of a picture.

Spread the Love

I believe in signs, now more than ever before. Sometimes a sign can point you in the right direction. Sometimes a sign can give you a little oomph or a simple pick me up. Sometimes a sign is too great to ignore.

For instance, I was eating candied ginger from Trader Joe's. As I was about to put a piece in my mouth, I opened up the page of a magazine. The magazine had 50 health tips and the first one I saw was about the health benefits of ginger. This particular occurrence was not sign-worthy to me. I wouldn't classify it as a sign from the gods telling me to eat ginger. However, it was a notable and funny event, which I shared with my roommate.

Later on, as I was about pop another ginger in my mouth, I saw a heart-shaped one. A glorious, pristine heart. I obviously had to photograph and share it with you. To me, this event was a small sign--a sign telling me that there is love everywhere, even in the most unexpected places.

I wasn't feeling upset or in need of comfort or love. I don't know what else I can do with the sign other than spread its message. By that, I mean: spread the love.

Do you believe in signs, coincidences, other, or none of the above?

Release Your Negative Energy

Ancient painting in a Greek church

 When I find myself troubled--the kind that twists my insides and gives me a quesy feeling in the pit of my stomach--I take a deep breath.

I try to remember: whatever is troubling me is not nearly as bad as what others are going through. Some people are homeless, hungry, and hoping for a different life.

I, however, am healthy and happy, along with those closest to me. It is human nature to become upset sometimes, but I try to release any negative energy as quickly as possible.

Jesus?

Dwelling on the past and bringing up negative times only depresses a person, so I prefer to think of the future and how bright it is. There are so many possibilities in this world and I am glad to be a part of it.

Technology and medicine is so advanced, people of my generation might easily live to be prosperous and healthy in our 100s.

A Journalist at Heart

Dreams of the future and 2011 ignite memories of the past. Many years have gone by. 

I remember:

high school, brain tumors, best friends who moved away, best friends who moved apart, best friends forever, best friends whom I ignored, best friends who wronged me, high school crushes, keeping secrets, traveling the world, cutting my hair, cutting my baggage, butterflies in my stomach, hours in the car, hours discussing issues, hours determining what to do, hours editing poorly written articles, a certain innocence, a certain romance, a trip to the mall to mend a broken friendship, a trip to a cat party, a trip to the zoo, just plain trippin, various clubs, various teachers, various days at lunch. 

There are no pictures to encapsulate the moment except for its memory in my brain. I try to grab on but sometimes they slip through my fingers. The time has passed and all that's left are memories. I can distinguish the changes in my personality from the high school version of myself to now. I am different. I changed. I aged. Yet I am the same. My core being, my deepest beliefs, my personality, remain the same, untouched. My self esteem, my face, my body, my habits, my friends changed considerably. Who can tell the difference?

"That part of me left yesterday

the heart of me is strong today

No regrets I'm blessed to say

the old me dead and gone away."

-aka Clifford Joseph Harris, Jr.

I must have always been a journalist at heart. Now I realize my favorite thing to write is a personality portrait. Every human, mammal, place has a story. Or a billion stories, really. Someone just needs to capture it. That person is me. My passion is the human next to me. That's one thing that hasn't changed since high school.  I've always been interested in others, constantly asking questions. What's your middle name? Ethnicity? Dream place to live?  If you died today, would you be happy? Or just content? Your secret? Ultimate wish?

When the same questions are directed at me, I hesitate and think in my head: Who would want to know about me, when I can write about you?

Bling in the New Year

Celebrating Christmas all year in 2011.

Well, well, well. Bring on the new year. Here it is. I am gonna milk this year for all it's got. I'm not going to allow this year to fly by without me noticing. This year, I'm keeping track.

I need to get my business in order this year. I'll have a lot on my plate. Luckily there are a couple more weeks before school starts back up. For now, I'll work, try to get writing jobs, and continue to have general good time before classes begin.

I had the luxury of celebrating the new year in a mansion, courtesy of a relative of a friend. It went something like this:

Who can resist petite pumpkin pie?

Bottoms up.

Bling in the new year: 2011.

2011: C'est La Vie

This post is pretty much for my own future reference, but feel free to keep tabs on your life too. I'll update this throughout the year.

Last year (aka 2010) went by way too fast. What did I do? What books did I read? What movies did I see? Who were my friends? What happened?!

This year, I am keeping track.

Films:

1. Going the Distance
2. G.I. Jane 
3. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest 
4. Waiting for Guffman 
5. Exit Through the Gift Shop 
6. The Pianist 
7. Nell 
8. The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
9. Chaos Theory
10. La Vie En Rose 
11. The Queen of the Damned  
12. Kim Cattrall: Sexual Intelligence
13. Manhattan
14. Black Hawk Down
15. There's No Business Like Show Business
16. The Fountain
17. Beauty & the Briefcase

TV Series:

1. 17 Kids & Counting
2. 18 Kids & Counting
3. Dexter: Season 1

Literature:

1. The Teachings of Buddha *work in progress
   

Hours Slept:

97


Hours Worked:

40

last updated: Jan. 17, 2011 @ 12:49 p.m.

2010: Scandal, Divorce, Death

The year is winding down. Only a couple more days until next year.

2010 came and went. I celebrated the new year at a small party. The moment of truth (12:00 a.m.) passed rapidly and before I knew it, I woke up and it was 12:00 p.m. on Jan. 1, 2010. Twelve hours of the brand new year went by as quick as lightning, now it's Dec. 30.

2010 was filled with scandal, divorce and death.

Scandal:

• Tiger Woods, Jesse James, and Tony Parker infidelity. 
• John Edwards fathers child with mistress.
• Four Loko reformulated. No more caffeine, kiddos. 
• Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Mel Gibson, Charlie Sheen act stupid.
• Katy Perry's boobs on Sesame Street.
• Miley Cyrus and the bong.

Divorce:

• Courteney Cox and David Arquette
• Sandra Bullock and Jesse James
• Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren 
• Christina Aguilera and Jordan Bratman
• Eva Longoria and Tony Parker

Death:

• Elizabeth Edwards succumbs to cancer.
• 7.0 Haiti earthquake damages equal $7.2 billion to $13.2 billion with a death toll from 200,000 to 250,000 according to the Inter-American Development Bank.   
• Winter Olympics in Vancouver, Canada and tragic death of Nodar Kumaritashvili, the 21-year-old Georgian luge competitor who died in a training crash.
• "Earthquakes, heat waves, floods, volcanoes, super typhoons, blizzards, landslides and droughts killed at least a quarter million people in 2010 - the deadliest year in more than a generation," according to the Washington Post.

Obviously, this isn't everything, but if I'm missing something super important, let me know!

Let us toast to 2011. May this be the year of  love, peace, and positivity (hopefully). 

Hocus Pocus Focus

Summer vacation, winter vacation, sick days, holidays, self-made vacations. You name the vacation, I will like it. It's the nicest feeling ever. During the holiday, I bask in my complete freedom.

It's all a matter of focus.

I dread having to go back home and work all day doing something I don't enjoy. One day that will change. I am on that journey right now. I am starting the transition so I can soon do what I like. Hopefully, it won't be in vain.

The terrible thing is, I don't know if I'm a good writer. Am I? My professors don't seem to think so, I don't get an A on every paper. I even had a professor go on about how journalism students write in a way he didn't like. Um, I thought I was supposed to be able to write better than others. I mean, that is my major. I am learning how to write. It is my expertise.

Focus the camera, focus my life.

In order to get what I want, I must focus on my career, my dream. Nothing is handed out on a silver platter, at least not for me.

 Freelance update:

• Money saving tips article.  Status: unpaid, unpublished.
• Pebbles article.  Status: paid, unpublished.
• Prayer.  Status: unpaid, published.

Very Merry

Merry Christmas. Feliz Navidad. Joyeux Noel. Buone Feste Natalizie. Kerismas Mobarak. Happy holidays.

Here's hoping everyone's Christmas is filled with joy, unlike this gingerbread man. Take in the warmth of love which Christmas brings, this day only lasts so long. In just a few hours the day will turn to night; December 25, 2010 will fly by, then we all must wait 365 days until this time next year.

Turn that frown upside down, little dude.

I always tell myself time flies, but it still surprises me how fast the months seem to pass. I'm surprised December is almost over and I wish I could rewind a few days so it could last longer. In this moment I am free of responsibility. No school. No work.  I sleep in, watch movies, spend time with my friends. This truly is a holiday.

Tis is the season of happiness. The chilly weather freezes my body, but on the inside I bask in the glory of this moment of cold. It never snows. It rarely rains. This is my way if getting in the spirit, and I love it.

Don't be disappointed in your gifts if they weren't exactly what you wanted. If possible, try to hold off bickering with your brother. Let this be a day of festivities, food, games, and gifts. Let's be merry today!

Twas Christmas Eve and 55 Degrees

Twas Christmas Eve and 55 degrees in the lovely state of California

a poem by me (Carmen)

The night was cheerful with smiles of delight,

all the world was happy in unison.

Christmas lights dazzle and shine from rooftops.

Children stare longingly at their presents,

waiting and wishing for tomorrow's day.

Parents drink many glasses of eggnog,

enjoying the warm spirit of Christmas.

Santa and reindeer travel the vast globe,

delivering gifts to every person.

Be merry and love everyone around.

You know what it is:

Red and green. Red and green. Red and green.

Winter Ambiance is Dead

Well, the rain stopped. There is no more winter ambiance. Now it just seems like a regular California winter.

I enjoyed the watery downfall. It was something different than I am used to. It rarely rains here so the past few days of constant rain had me thinking I teleported to Seattle. Maybe I can go out in shorts sometime soon or maybe I'll go on a hike.

 The week is flying by, but thankfully I spend my time in great company. I will have many crazy, hilarious, fantastic memories.

In the future, I will look back and remember these days of rain and friends. I will be happy and smile to myself. I will think of how things change, how young I was, how stupid I was, how great it was.

Maybe it's the seasonal, winter, Christmas spirit in me, but I am basking in the glory of December 2010. Only a few more days until next year.

Cold as Ice, Despite Socks

After taking several modes of transportation to travel home for Christmas (bus, train, car), I finally am here. Usually I am waking up late for class or running to work, but now I can finally have a holiday. I can rest. I can meditate. I can chill out. I will spend the next few days doing absolutely nothing with my favorite people. I will create new memories to tide me over until the next time I see my friends. I will have an amazing time.

It feels like Christmas now, and I'm just soaking it in before it passes. The sky is gray. The trees violently jerk in the wind. Rain splatters on the window.  The rain hasn't stopped, but I have mastered the art of layering. I'm cozy, except my feet are always cold as ice, despite socks. I love the feeling of being warm in cold weather.

A mug of Bengal Spice by Celestial Seasonings with hemp milk is my definition of heaven, minus the curdling. I also tried Sweet Apple Chamomile, which was scrumptious as well. I watched 500 Days of Summer again. I forgot how great this film is, very raw and true. Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are great.

I feel wonderful.

Xmas. Rain. Tron.

I'm in the mood for Christmas. The Christmas spirit is officially in me. Christmas 2010 is around the corner, and it's difficult to come up with unique Christmas gifts. I haven't come up with a Christmas list or anything official, but I have hinted at what I want.

Rainy day in Seattle, WA.

It has been raining all day and it rarely rains where I live. I've got rain on my mind:

• When it rains it pours. Don't rain on my parade. It's raining men.

• "Singing in the Rain." I used to love this movie as a kid. This is truly a great classic with awesome costumes.
• "November Rain" by Guns N Roses. I adore this song. It didn't really rain in November though. 

 "Nothin' lasts forever and we both know hearts can change,

And it's hard to hold a candle in the cold November rain."

Rain puddles in Athens, Greece.

• "Purple Rain" by Prince. Hmm...I prefer "Purple Haze" by Jimi Hendrix.
• "No Rain" by Blind Melon.

"And I start to complain that there's no rain
And all I can do is read a book to stay awake
And it rips my life away, but it's a great escape."

• "A Year Without Rain" by Selena Gomez. Not really my thing, but it wasn't so awful.

Things that are interesting to me:

After the rain in Vienna, Austria.

• Senate has voted to end the "don't ask, don't tell" policy. That's kinda progressive. Thank goodness.
• TRON: Legacy. I feel nerdy saying this, but this actually looks really good. After I saw the TRON: Legacy trailer, I couldn't resist. I love Jeff Bridges and the visual effects look spectacular.
• Christmas countdown. This is awesome, maybe it should be my screensaver. Christmas is coming so soon! I can't believe it.
• Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds split. Aw. How sad, I was looking forward to seeing if the Scarnolds kids would be cuter than Brangelina's. However, this is mainly a good thing, because now I can have Ryan all to myself.

Since it's is gloomy, I just want to cozy up with some delicious instant hot chocolate and watch movies from my instant Netflix queue. Sounds like the perfect way to spend my vacation.

Prayer

I never thought I'd say this, but I'm a prayer writer. Well, for an assignment I am perfectly capable of writing a prayer. It isn't published yet, but it is scheduled to be showcased as a Daily Prayable on Dec. 24, 2010. It will also be shown somewhere on the website.

My prayer is Christmas Eve worthy! Woo hoo! Apparently I have a spiritual knack with my words. This website is directed toward women of any religious background. People from all religions can feel comfortable because there is no religious affiliation. It's kinda neat.

This is pretty exciting for me, seeing as this will be my first paid and published assignment. If all goes well. However, this website is more credible than my other assignment. So here's hoping this one is legit.

Stay tuned and only the future will tell if this goes through. Hopefully this will be my first freelance writing gig.

Semester Accomplished!

See you next year. I won't miss you.

Now I have a few weeks to spend some quality time with 2010. Now I can enjoy my holiday, since it snuck up on me so quickly. Writing assignments, essays, quizzes, tests,  and homework don't exist right now. I can marvel in the little things. Finally!

My favorite things about this time of year:

1. Gingerbread man cookies. Yum. Why are they so delicious and cute?

2. Layering clothes. I can wear more of my clothes during this season, seeing as I can wear more than one layer. Shirt, cardigan, scarf, leggings, socks, boots.

3. Tea. I love tea anyway, but now is the time I drink it all day. Chai tea with soy milk.

4. Bed. The warmth of my bed is so comforting. As a child, when I was scared I would hide under the blanket. "Nothing will get me under here," said a 5-year-old me.

Anonymous Author

So here's the deal. Here is my internal anguish. I just finished writing my first freelance article. It's for a not yet published, small, self-made magazine in NYC geared toward lower and middle class families. I wrote an article on money saving tips.

A. Make sure nobody is looking.   B. Steal.

In my optimistic, dreaming mind I was excited for my first assignment. Wow. Here's my chance. My time to shine. My first step to the rest of my life. Go me!

I put in hours of my time. I had to brainstorm, form, craft, and weave these words together so they could be read fluidly. I had to read and reread and re-reread until it sounded perfect. I had to make sure the average person could read it and comprehend my thoughts.

I sent the article to him a couple days ago and here I sit still waiting for the bill. Will he pay or will he scam me? Will he steal my work, not give me any credit for it, or pay me? Will I be a no name? Anonymous. This is the internet after all. There are no binding laws. If he doesn't pull through what can I do? Stomp my feet? Send angry emails? If he doesn't fork over my money, I'll admit, I'll be mad. I put time into this piece.

What if he does pull through? Maybe I'm just jumping to conclusions. This is his first issue. Perhaps he is swamped with creating his own personal vision, just as I am. Am I a little too caught up in the money?

I just wanna be, I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful.

Give Peace a Chance

In a world where war is prevalent, try to love. There is so much hate and war in this world. Let's have it be over, okay? Let us all be friends.

No more war in Iraq or Afghanistan. Let's get along with the Iranians. Love thy neighbor.  Stereotypes are out-dated. We live in an age where everything is revolutionary and brand new. We have so many opportunities, but we want others to fail.

Humans can be selfish creatures. We have a negative way of thinking: my success is more important than your success. I want to make money, I don't care who I backstab to get it.

We should be more like dogs. Really. That sounds bad, but look at them. First off, from when they are puppies to when they are old, they're so darn cute. But dogs are also extraordinarily loyal and adoring, they never stop loving you. Ever, ever, ever. They like most people, dogs, animals and don't have anything negative to say. Scooby Doo and Lassie are awesome!


Remember this simple equation:

(Love > Hate) + (Peace > War) = Global Harmony.

The end.